Saturday, January 20, 2018

Don't Insult German Cops Story

There's probably a hundred bits of advice I give 'new' Americans in Germany....but up toward the very top of the list....don't insult or provoke German cops or border-control authorities.

I sat this morning and was reading through regional news in Hessen, and HR put out this short story of an American's little adventure or tirade at the Frankfurt Airport.

Germans perform a fair amount of security now, and there's a list of things that you don't bring along in your hand baggage.....one in particular is liquids.  The rule allows a bag to exist of a particular size, and whatever fits into the bag in terms of liquids....is IT.

So this American gal....actually noted in US peace circles....name unlisted (professor at Georgetown University)....got into a little argument over their rules.  She had a can of deodorant (liquid), and they told us the standard solution....either it fits into your plastic bag, or you throw it into the garbage can because you can't bring it with you. By the new item, it appears that her plastic bag was practically full already....so they went to the routine of you having to throw the item away.

I've sat and watched the German security guys and border control folks on dozens of occasions enforce the rule.  They are awful polite but strict.  You can argue about the matter in a respectful way but it won't matter....whatever liquid you dragged along....won't go through the system or be allowed in the carry-on.

Well....the professor went to the next routine which I strongly recommend to avoid.  She uttered the words: ""fucking bastards" and "fucking German Nazi police". Yep....that was a serious problem for the cops, and they felt insulted.  In German law, that gets you into some legal trouble, with a fine.

I'm guessing they tried to calm her down but it didn't work.  The German cops then pulled out the paperwork and processed her on a charge of insulting the police.  A preliminary investigation on suspicion of slander exists.  To exit the country at that point, you have to deposit roughly 200 Euro.  That's not the fine but just a deposit.

I guess at this point, she stopped talking and just went to Twitter to 'jab' at them. They monitored that and noted that bad behavior as well.  Then she even suggested via Twitter....that the German cops robbed her.

Needless to say.....the professor has probably extinguished her welcome on the next trip into Germany and will have issues.  On the insult level, there will be some court activity likely coming out of this and she will fail to show (my humble guess).  What can the German court system issue in terms of slander?  Well....the judge controls the process, and you have two possibilities.  One is a fine.  The other is a period of jail....NOT to exceed twelve months in a state prison.

Actually, there's even another German criminal code (section 189) which says you can't insult or slander anyone who is dead.  That could get you a fine, or possibly up to two years in prison.

To be honest, I've only heard of two episodes ever where folks went to the slander episode and had court activity which they were convicted and got jail-time.  In both cases, it was 30 to 60 days of jail-time.  So it's awful rare that you get jail....but I also think it's awful rare that any German will insult the cops, and particularly rare to insult dead people.

I should note here....just suggesting someone is crazy...could be enough to suggest slander and have the cops and court involved.  A lot of this business goes back the 1800s in Germany and the various rules which were developed to control people's anger.

In the professor's case?  I think the court episode will come up....she probably won't show, and they will process her through some guilty point.  A fine of probably a thousand Euro or less will be the likely outcome....with probably no jail-time.  However, IF the professor continues the tirade on Twitter enough (they will monitor it) then they will have evidence to go onto the next level and suggest to the judge that a month in jail might be necessary.

My advice to the professor is to turn off the Twitter chat business for a month....say a few apologies, hire a German lawyer and just pay the fine as quickly as possible.   Otherwise, don't plan on an entry into the EU or the enforcement business will affect you.

Bottom line....if ever dealing with German cops or border control....don't do anything stupid.

Added note: If you want the other version of what happened, it's up on Huffington Post.  HR basically told a 15-line story.  Fair wrote out a 200-line story, and noted a number of behavioral issues with the cops....whether true or not....it's up to you the reader to decide.

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